It isn't funny

April Fool's day.

A day I have been dreading for 2 weeks.

Why?

Because on this day, every year, so many get their heart's bruised from a simple joke that was meant to entertain, but instead it unintentionally hurts.

I'm not a fan of beating a dead horse and I know that many have seen or know my concern for social media posts that can damage hearts of infertile women, but I just want to give a gentle reminder before you hit "post" on that dagger of an April Fool's joke.

1. Infertility hurts. As if I even need to go any further.  Everyday I wake up hoping to miss the all to common social media pregnancy announcement.  It's not that I'm not happy for you.  Or that I can't understand the excitement you must be feeling.  Actually, it's just the opposite. I CAN understand.  Because there are days when I sit and daydream about what it would be like for me to post just the same.  Or to think about how we would tell.  So when I see you post a joke about being pregnant to get a rise out of people, it hurts me.  Down to the deepest part of my heart that aches everyday for that baby to be mine.  Hurts me in knowing that what I pray so hard for everyday, is something that you take lightly enough to joke about.  I know in my heart that you don't mean for it to hurt me.  But the devil creeps in and says "Doesn't that make you furious?  That person doesn't care about you or your feelings."  I know that not to be true.   So I pray for God's comfort and peace to surround me and my throbbing heart.  And He always comes through.  But, somehow it's still there the next day.  It's a daily struggle.  Just don't do it.  Think of something really outlandish that no one would expect, like I'm moving to an exotic island for a job offer.  Just please, please, please stay away from anything that involves growing a human life inside of you.

2. Loss.  It's a little word we all wish we could avoid.  But unfortunately,  it can't be avoided.  Everyday there are couples who miscarry, have a stillbirth, find that the excitement of their pregnancy is going to come to a screeching halt because their baby has a disease or genetic malfunction that is not compatible with life, and on and on and on.  Don't believe me?  Come job shadow me one day.  And that's just one labor and delivery unit.  Think about all the same units across the world.  And wouldn't you feel terrible if the same day that someone, who just isn't ready to talk, but knows it needs to be told, posts on a social media site their heartbreak, only to see your "joke" of a pregnancy announcement.  Is it worth it?

3. Some people DO use social media for serious matters.  I see it everyday.  Pictures of kids and families, graduation announcements, announcement of births, deaths and everything in between, requests for prayer, excitement over new jobs and so on.  Yes social media is meant to be fun.  But it is also a way for others to communicate to the masses of serious matters and about life in general.  That's serious to me!  I wanna celebrate with you and grieve with you and pray for you all at the same time if need be.  And if it weren't for social media, most of those things would never be shared.  Not to long ago I saw this on Facebook: 

"Wow...I can't believe people take that "game" so seriously...people that take fb too seriously don't need to be on fb if things like this hurt their feelings.  And that my friend...is my opinion :D"

Tears streamed down my face after reading this.  Not because it was a friend who wrote it.  In all honesty, I didn't even know the person.  But it hurt.  And it made me hurt for others that would read it also.  If you post pictures of your family or even of yourself, then you are using social media in a serious matter.  If you write anything about your life, job, family, kids, loss, suffering or prayer needs on social media, then you are using it in a serious way.  Why?  Because those ARE serious things.  Just be careful and be conscious.  And that my friends...is my opinion.

So there you have it.  Just a few reasons why you shouldn't do it.  You may read this and think I'm the most ridiculous person on the face of this planet.  And that's okay.  But the fact is, if you haven't experienced what I'm going through in life or vice versa, how can you or I say it doesn't hurt.  You can't.

My prayer is that none of you reading this CAN ever know what I'm going through.  Because that would mean that you too feel as I do some days.  And that hurts me for you.  But I know that it's simply impossible for everyone reading this to have no problems with conceiving, or losing a child or baby.  So today my prayer is for all of you that ARE struggling with infertility, loss or failed adoption.  May God be with you on this silly day of "harmless" jokes and pranks.

Today, try and be a blessing to someone who needs it.  Stand up for those that you know may be hurt because of the above stated things.  Even if it isn't you, yourself.  Sometimes just a gentle reminder is all it takes.

With much love my friends,

Jen

7 and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.  Philippians 4:7